Tell me you’re not at least a little disturbed by the following:
#1: Cat-O-Vision
A team of scientists hacked into a cat’s brain and created a video of what the cat was seeing.
#2: We Have Ways Of Making You Purr
Restricting sleep to two hours a night, enforced by use of a treadmill. Sounds like a Guantanamo Bay interrogation technique, does it not? No, this is science. You’ll be pleased to know that restricting sleep results in a greater proportion of REM sleep in cats.
#3: Cats In Spaaaace
How do cats react to zero gravity? Do they handle it better than dogs? This is the scientific question of our times and only now has it been answered.
#4: I’m Not Hungry. (Bzzt.) Actually, I Am.
Scientists obtained complete control over a cat’s mind. By remote control, they could make the cat hungry, thirsty, or itchy, or even make it more aggressive or affectionate. Note that they did not force the cat to eat; they only made it desire to eat.
#5: Just Gimme One More Bowl
Do cats prefer spiked milk to ordinary milk? Only science could provide the answer. A series of experiments was performed that subjected cats to extreme stress until they became alcoholics, or masochistic, deliberately exposing themselves to repeated electric shocks.
BONUS: The Scratching Post Is Melting
Giving LSD to cats. Does this qualify as science? Discuss.
(This post is at least partly inspired by the Top 5 Group Writing Project at ProBlogger.)






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May 10, 2007 at 7:38 pm
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May 10, 2007 at 3:14 pm
Darren
I suspect this one will cause a stirr…. (not a purrrrr)
May 10, 2007 at 3:29 pm
Markk
There have been a lot of entries for the Top 5 Project, but I think I’m the first to cover this topic. I certainly learned something doing the research for it.
May 11, 2007 at 10:27 am
themolk
Pfffft. What have cast got to teach us? Nothing, that’s what. We need to be substituting vacuous californian hotel chain heiresses into this research for some real results.
May 11, 2007 at 10:28 am
themolk
sorry - “What have CATS got to teach us”… pressed submit that second too early…
May 11, 2007 at 10:28 am
themolk
…you know what I mean…
May 11, 2007 at 1:21 pm
Markk
Nah. The brains of cats are more complex than those of hotel heiresses. Much more useful for science.
May 12, 2007 at 12:30 am
alec
Let’s kill some cats and turn them into tennis racquet string.
May 12, 2007 at 9:45 am
Armen
Oh…I just know my wife would love to read this — not!