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I was walking down the Nepean Highway in downtown Frankston (motto: “Bogans By The Sea”) when I came across this gem of graffiti scrawled across a wall:
I’m not sure many people will agree with this sentiment; there are an awful lot of “I Love Frankston” bumper stickers on local cars. But what could cause such discontent? Another piece of graffiti, conveniently right next to it, could provide the explanation:
In case you can’t read that, it states:
“Frankston is a microcosm of Australia. Public servants are parasites feeding off the people of this country. It’s now a crime for a father to catch public transport.”
It was that last statement that caught my attention. It’s now illegal for a father to catch public transport? When did this happen? Why have I not heard about this? And if this is incorrect, how did our graffiti scribbler come to think otherwise?
Imagine this scenario:
You are a man, old enough to be a parent, in Frankston, when you decide to catch a bus to Cranbourne (since you’ve always wanted to see the Botanic Gardens, remember?). No sooner do you board the bus, when who should step on but two transit police! They stroll purposefully in your direction, and you have a feeling they’re headed for you. No matter, you think, you have a valid ticket. You are ready to produce it for inspection when one of the cops says:
“Are you a father?”
“Er - no.”
“Are you in league with fathers?”
And since you can NOT prove that you are NOT a father, nor a father-sympathiser, you are politely but firmly escorted from the bus.
Could this happen in Australia? Seems unlikely to me, but I suppose there’s a first time for everything. Perhaps a local expert, such as Pete from Freaked Out Fathers, could shed some light on this matter.
A Facebook friend started a feature called “Whose butt is it anyway?” I looked, and lo and behold:
It was mine!
I have a nice butt, don’t you think?
There is a fine line between bravery and stupidity - and that line is called rodeo. It never ceases to amaze me what some people will do in the name of sport. Rodeo seems to attract the thrillseeker who seemingly cheats death in the arena; it is the closest thing we have to the ancient Roman Colosseum.
But is it not entertaining? The sight of men backing themselves against wild beasts in this way charges the adrenaline and assaults the senses.
One of the most well-known rodeo events is National Finals Rodeo, organised by the Professional Rodeo Cowboys Association. This is often called the superbowl of rodeo; and like the superbowl, National Rodeo Finals tickets ain’t cheap. Held at the Thomas and Mack Center in Las Vegas, the NFR features bareback riding, steer wrestling, team roping, saddle bronc riding, tie-down roping, bull riding and barrel racing. Eight world champions are crowned during the NFR.
This multi-event spectacle is normally a sell-out at all events. Many Las Vegas hotels and casinos cater for those who could not get tickets with rodeo parties.
During the event, the Cowboy Christmas Gift Show is held at the Las Vegas Convention Center. This features around 400 vendors selling cowboy-themed products. Free shuttle buses run between the Cowboy Christmas and the NFR.
I recently received this via an email list I’m subscribed to:
YOU ARE INVITED TO EMAIL OR POST US A SHORT BIRTHDAY GREETING TO ISRAEL (Maximum 50 words) for her 60th birthday. We will collate these and make them into a book with an appropriate cover that will be presented to the representative of Israel’s Ambassador on May 13 as a lasting memorial of our support to the Nation of Israel. But be quick because we need them in soon. Take 2 minutes and do it now!
That’s all very well, I suppose, but I’d rather give Israel a birthday message on this blog. So here goes:
Happy birthday, Israel.
I hope all the Israelis reading this feel suitably chuffed.
For those of you who don’t know who Corey Worthington is, he is notorious for throwing a massive, uncontrolled party at his parents house while they were on holiday. He advertised it to all-comers on Myspace and over 500 people showed up. The party quickly degenerated into mayhem; there was over $20,000 in damages and police called in helicopters.
Afterwards, Corey was famously unrepentant, offering to organise parties for anyone who asked on national television.
You can find out more about Corey at The Age, Crikey, YouTube and many other places.
My brother decided Corey was an appropriate person to dress up as at a recent party. For your reference, Corey looks like this:
Here’s my brother in action:
(Photo credit: PopMatters)
So begins one of my favourite songs from my formative years - “Dead Eyes Opened (1993 Remix)” by Severed Heads. (Dig that band name!)
In 1993 I was a teenager and very much into grunge music. Nirvana, Smashing Pumpkins and Soundgarden were my favourite bands. I didn’t bother with any other genres, particularly not techno music. Dead Eyes Opened was one of the few exceptions to this.
The track could loosely be called dance music; I suppose nowadays it would be called house music. Perhaps Horror House, if there is such a thing. It’s a fairly eerie piece of music that builds up into a climax about midway through the song. Quite well done if you ask me.
I remember playing it to my dad; he didn’t like it.
The clip for the song didn’t get any airplay at that time due to strobing and sexual content (amusing, given that it’s about 10% as sexy as any RnB or rap clip, but I guess ratings systems have always been a tad arbitrary).
Dead Eyes Opened is hard to find anywhere nowadays, legally or otherwise; but I did find the video clip on YouTube. Hurrah for YouTube!
Some students with too much spare time have immersed a computer into a tank full of mineral water:
As you can see, the computer is apparently fully operational.
You may be asking yourself: is this not completely pointless? On the contrary: if some of the more alarming Global Warming projections turn out to be correct, those of us who live near coastlines shall need to know how to keep computers working underwater. Not to mention fridges, cars, TVs etc.
Perhaps next these students can work on gill transplants.
Is there no end to the nuttiness to be found on YouTube? My brother has alerted me to this gem - a Korean band, with easily the most joyfully flamboyant drummer I’ve ever seen.
RSS readers click here to view the video (I wish the damn thing would just appear in the feed *sigh*)
Check out this YouTube vid of a new Wii game, Pii Pii Brothers. (RSS readers click here to view)
The perfect man-simulation for women of all ages, I’m sure.
(Found at Hello Internet)
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